Love Has No Labels

How many of us when we first turned on the video were expecting something much different?  We have set prejudice and bias that we do not want to admit.  We have in our mind what love should look like.  We all do it.  We base our idea on love on past experiences.  We assume that people love just the way we love.  We say that we do not put labels on who can share love.  Yet deep down we do put labels on love.

The one difference that I think has the last stigma is that of different abilities.  I think that television and movies have really helped tear down this wall.  We see people returning from combat who have lost their limbs, have traumatic brain injuries or suffer from PTSD and are returning to their families.  Their families are just grateful to have them back that they overlook the disability.  The news has done a great job of showing that a disability doesn’t interfere with your ability to love.  We see stories of love between parents that have done great things to make their differently able child do miraculous things.  We see TV shows helping give people with disabilities anew release on life.  Many disabilities are not visible to our eyes.  We never know who we may fall in love with and then learn that they have life changing disabilities that are not visible to the eye.  Yet, that doesn’t keep us from loving them. 

My partner and I have no problem with society accepting our love due to us both having disabilities.  In fact, most of our friends are happy that we found someone that can accept our limitations.  We both have things that we can and cannot do and we work it out among ourselves.  It is amazing how you can have a disability and not be looked at as if you are incapable of showing love.  Most people will overlook the disability that we have and just see us as two people making the best of life with what we can do.  Our love is in no way affected by our disability in a negative way.  In fact, our love may be stronger because we want to be with each other as share as much time we have with each other.

Many of us do not have problems with people who are different races falling in love.   We have in most cases accepted that people who are different races can love each other.  Our children are in situations in which they have friends of different races and they grow up not looking at skin color when it comes to loving others.  In fact, that there are so many different kinds of people in the United States crossing the boundary of race we all have different make-up of races in our own body make up.  So how can we stop two people from loving each other because of race especially if we take account of the multitudes of races we are.

I can remember as a friend that my best friends were not the same race as myself.  I had friends that were all colors of the rainbow.  In fact, being part Native American the majority of all of my friends are a different race than I am.  My partner has African American in her genetic make-up.  So we do not share the same genetic race make-up, but it doesn’t that we love each other less.  In fact, our race has nothing to do with the amount of love we share with each other.  No one has ever said that you are can’t be together because of your race differences.  I know so many other biracial couples that love each other and they never look at each other and say we are special because we are different. 

Next we can accept that people of different ages can love each other.  We know in our own life that we have close friends that we love that are of different ages.  We have friends that are older than us.  We have friends that are younger than us.  It is not uncommon for people to fall madly love with someone that is not their age. 

My partner and I have 22 years difference in our age.  It is amazing how many people think that I am her child.  They want to look at us and try to justify in their mind our relationship.  Then after we tell them that we are a couple they usually say “Awe” and move on.  Our age difference hasn’t affected our love in a negative way.  Instead our love has matured over time as we have both aged and dealt with life.  I like to say that I learned had to be more mature and take on responsibility in our relationship.  My partner has kept young because she is with me.  We are able to learn from each other and grow closer to each other every day.

We usually have no problem accepting people with different religious backgrounds being in love.  In fact, in most situations you will not know that they do have different religious beliefs.  You often find out that your friends are just other people that have similar likes.  Then the days come that you find out that you do not share the same religion.  In most cases we remain friends and in some situations fall in love.  When you look at this video just think of this all the people may have different religious beliefs.  Yet, the only time that you question it is when people show outward signs of their religion that it even pops in your mind how can they be friends.  Yet, in other situations you would not question their friendship or the love a couple shares. 

I tell people all the time that we met the right way.  They look at me funny and then I say we met at Church.  You would first think that we share all the same religious beliefs.  Yet this is not entirely true there are things that we see differently.  Yet, we are both in love with each other.  We have learned from each other.   Those in our life do not know about the little differences that we have about religion. 

I also have other friends that are very close and dear that have very different religious beliefs from me.  Yet, it doesn’t affect our relationship.  Our similarities have led us to love each other.  No one judges because we are different.  We need to remember that we should not let religious beliefs keep us from loving each other. 

There is one stereotype that does bring a lot of prejudices.  Look at the first couple you see.  Couples behind the screen who are showing each other love.  Their skeletons do not let out the secret of their identity.  They stick their heads out from the screen and you find that they are two women.  This is one of the areas that people have the most trouble with.  

Think on this a moment how many people see a man and woman kissing and go “awe isn’t that sweet.”  The same people two men kissing or two women and their skin crawls.  People even get stressed out when they are holding hands or showing any type of affection.  They are afraid of them.  They fear that their kids may be influenced by them.  That somehow the public affection will lead to something terrible.   In some situations we miss that these same gender contacts might not be couples.  It may be two brother, two cousins, two sisters, showing each other affection.  Yet, we have been trained to think of this as a bad situation.   

I really believe that our religious institutions have caused some of the problems.  Many teach that it is a moral sin to show love to someone that is the same gender.  Many talk hate and spread fear throughout their congregation and the community.  The problem is that Jesus was the definition of love.  We have to show each other love for that is what God wants from us.  The problem is we have missed the fact that Jesus talks about love and we have taken a few scriptures and say that this is what God says about same sex relationships.

Being a lesbian couple is definitely not easy.  People judge us.  Our immediate family had to go through a time of adjustment some have accepted others shun us.  We get stares from people who think we should not be together.  We have people who try to convince us that we are living in sin.  It is very difficult to see people being able to hold hands and share their love.  While at the same time you have to be careful how you share your love in public.  You feel safe only in certain places.  You avoid certain areas because of fear of being hurt.  You go through life looking over your shoulder because you feel ostracized from mainstream society and you never know when a situation may go bad. 

All of our differences have helped us be able to share our love without people labeling our love.  For example with us both using assisted devices people understand when we are arm in arm helping each other.  Because of our age people always assume I am walking with my mom and they think it is sweet that we are so close.  People miss the fact that we share separate races. 

Look at your own life what labels are you putting on people.  Have you set up biases that affect how people can love?  Do you need to stop judging others?  Do you need to accept people and those that they love?  Do you need to open your hearts up to people that are different from you? 

The fact is that if you look at all the differences we share we will see that we all are in some ways different from others.  We will see that we are all a combination of many labels.  This only goes to show that we can live together in love.  In actuality, what you find is there are all kinds of different people that love each other.  We have to come and accept this and strive to show others it is okay to love each other in peace.

Lent: to Give Up or to Take On

Lent is that time in the year that we prepare for Christ to take that long walk to Calvary.  To then be hung on the cross and to die to this world.  Then we wake up on Easter Morn with the Christ being the conqueror of this world.  Our life has been renewed and we are closer to God because of our time preparing for this pivotal moment in history. 

People often spend the time in prayer and fasting.  They will also give up something that means a lot to them.  This item helps reminds them of the life Jesus gave up for them.  This is considered a sacrifice that reminds them every day of giving up a little piece of themselves to God.  On Eastern Morn, many will go back to the things that they have given up.  They may choose different things each year but many sacrifice the same things.  We often think of giving up on red meat on Friday as an example of this type of sacrifice.  Through these actions they grow closer to Jesus and the sacrifice that was made for their life.

Other people will give up things that interfere with their connection with God.  We will hear people say they are giving up sugar, cigarettes, alcohol or other dangerous items.  This sacrifice leads them to draw closer to God.  In the process they choose a habit they feel has interfered with their relationship with God.  Over the period of Lent they come to realize that they do not need the habit in their life.  Therefor on Eastern Morn, they walk away from the habit for good.  This represents the fact that our sins were left behind in the grave when Jesus arose on Eastern Morning.

There are other people that take on things for Lent.  They see their sacrifice as taking on additional responses or activities which will bring them closer to God.  Many will take up reading scripture, starting a bible study, or doing a daily devotional.  Through taking on more things they are representing the many things that Jesus had to carry with him on the cross.  Jesus wasn’t on the cross because what he had done he was there because of what we had done.  Therefor taking on extra responsibilities leads the person to a closer walk to God. 

We also have to remember those that do not give up or take on anything for Lent.  They feel as they should live their whole life in dedication to God.  They believe there is no reason to do something special for a short period of time to express their love of God.  They feel that every day should be a day spent connected with God in as many ways as possible.

Now is one group right and the other groups wrong?  Is there a right way to observe Lent?  Is there a wrong way to observe Lent?  Is it wrong not to observe Lent?  We want things to fit in a perfect box so we have a hard time understanding when people do not do things the way we do it. 

Is there a possibility to come to a common ground?  A time in which we accept that our way is not the only way.  People miss the one thing that there four groups of people want.  They all want a closer walk with God.  If it helps someone to walk closer to God to give up something they cherish for a small amount of time, how can we deny it?  If it helps someone else to come closer to God by giving up a bad habit, why would we stop it?  If it helps someone feel closer to God by taking on extra spiritual things, who are we to say they are wrong?  If someone feels that they do not have to do anything yet desire a closer walk with God, who are we to criticize? 

God does not set in stone the ways that we must worship God.  The wonderful thing about God is that we can manifest our faith in the way that we need to do it that makes us feel closer to God.  We should never look down upon someone that is worshipping God in their own way.  We should rejoice in the fact that we are being joined by others in the preparedness of the arrival of our Savior.

There is one other thing that we need to consider.   How do we communicate with people that are not worshiping God?  The lost and unchurched those feel abandoned in the world.  How do we reach outside our comfort zones and bring Christ to them.  See we have to understand that religion has made victims throughout times.  We need to accept that there are people that have left the comfort zone of the church for one reason or another.  Many of them will never return.  How do we help them walk a little closer to God?

We can help these groups by sharing our stories.  We can be less critical of the way people live their life.  We can attempt to see the world through their eyes.  We need to try to see their pain and to share our pain.  When we are able to show people that Christ died for all, lives are changed.  It is shameful if we continue walking in our bubble missing the fact that there are so many in the world hurting today.  We have to be open to their differences before we can ever restore their hope.

The next time we come across someone that is in that place of uncertainty with God we need to stop and think back to when we felt the same way.  We need to ask ourselves what made us get over that feeling.  Did someone help us?  Did God deliver the message through an angel, a person like us?  Were we able to see Jesus in the way someone treated us?  Did we feel welcomed because someone accepted us the way we were without rejection?

Christians can observe Lent in so many ways and as long as their goal is the same then they are doing what God has called them to do.  Yet, if they fail to help one that is hurting they are not only walking further away from God but they are leading the person down the slippery slope.  Stop for one moment and ask God what you need to do this day.  Is God asking you to go out of your comfort zone?  Are you being asked to do something that you thought you would never do?  Is that what it takes to get you in a closer relationship with God?  Are you willing to do it?  Are you willing to help those that are hungry find food?  Are you willing to give drink to the thirsty?  Are you there to give spiritual comfort to those that are hurting?  If not what do you need to change or accept in your life to get to that point spiritually.

Lent it is up to you to live it the way that makes you feel closer to God.  Yet don’t forget about all those that need to see Christ in you.  Remember your closest walk with God may come in a way you least expected it.

Do All Dogs Go To Heaven?

We are told in Genesis that we (humankind) are to have dominion over all of the animals. We are created in God's image.  We know that God is love.  Since we are created in God’s image should we not be a reflection of love.  Therefor we should love not only each other but all of creation.

The sad part is that we have done a lot of damage over the years to God’s creation.  We have killed animals to the point that they have become extinct.  We have destroyed land that was occupied by animals.  We have taken creation and turned it upside down.  Instead of showing love we have become those that use creation and manipulate it and cause major destruction to the planet God has given to us.

I want us to remember that even when God covered all the Earth with water the animals were given a safe place.  Just like Noah and his family the animals were gathered together so that they may have a place to avoid the floods damage.  They traveled with Noah and they were treated as treasures.  When the boat finally rested on the mount the animals were released from the ark.  Both humankind and animals were able to procreate and fill the Earth again with love

God knew that we would need companions in our life.  Many people have special pets that fill that need for companionship.  They treat them like their children.  They go out of their way to give them love.  They give them immunizations shots, special food, and other medical procedures to keep their pets healthy. 

Some Christians will say that animals do not go to Heaven.  Their reason is that they believe animals have no souls.  They believe that only people go to Heaven because we have a soul.  We have the opportunity to accept Jesus in our life.  Humans are believed to be the only creatures on the Earth that understand the difference between sinning and not sinning. 

Others believe that all animals especially pets go to Heaven.  They believe this because of the different emotions that animal’s exhibit.  Our pets return our love.  Not only do they return our love but they do it unconditionally.  They put their trust in us that we will provide all their needs.  Animals will show sadness at death of other animals or owners. 

They get upset when we leave them.  They show happiness when we return. 

These two sides have battled each other for a long time.  People that think their pets do not go to Heaven usually do not consider their pets the same way that those thinking they will go to Heaven respond.  If you don’t believe pets go to Heaven you will have a hard time when they see people tore up because of a loss of a pet.  They can’t understand how someone would feel that way about a pet.  Those that think the pets go to Heaven cannot comprehend when people do not show a lot of emotion when they pass away.

I propose that these two sides come to a common ground.  We need to recognize that all people are created in the image of God filled with love with that we can come to a compassionate understanding of other people.  What does it hurt if someone thinks their beloved pet goes to Heaven?  We can come to understand that it isn’t a debate over if pets or going to Heaven instead it is an acceptance of people’s love.

We also can go one step further.  We can come to an understanding that we need to start treating animals with passion.  We can learn that destroying the habitat of animals kills off the creatures God saved on the arc.  Imagine how the world would be if we showed love to each other and to the Earth we live on.

Accepting that we have to care about the earth will change our attitude.  It isn’t all about what we can have or want to have.  Instead we can understand that the planet needs to be taken care of.  We have to take responsibility to ensure that the creatures of this world can live in peace and harmony.  We have to remember that we are the caregivers of God’s creation. 

The next time you meet someone that has lost their pet allows them to grieve the way they need to grieve.  Some will be very upset because their beloved pet has passed away.  They may feel in their heart that they will one date meet their pet in the next life. Others may grieve in a much different way. Allow them to have this grieving mechanism. 

We have to remember none of us for certain know where our beloved pets will go when they pass on.  I think back to the movie “All Dogs Go to Heaven” and how it helps children when their pets pass away.  It isn’t giving them false hope it is just letting know that they can be sad but their pet is safe.  We have to understand that this is important to anyone that has lost someone or a pet.  We need to know that they are heading to a much better place.  Once we can accept that we can start to heal in the grieving process.

Written in remembrance of Karma you will always be loved and missed.